Change and Letting Go


I have been one who is always fighting change.  Though it is good for me, I hate the emotional pain.  I hate losing the person I once had in my life.  I hate losing the good emotions, the good times, and the good connections.  I do not mind losing the bad times.  I hate losing the dreams and the ‘what ifs.’

So what do I do next?  We are obviously heading in different directions and there is nothing I can do about it.  Would it be good to keep the person in my life when they cannot give me what I need?  Would it be good for me to keep them in my life if they themselves do not take care of themselves?

Where will I go?  Will I ever find anyone like them?  I hope so.  I hope better than them, though the odds seem insurmountable.

So I write this post to get the angst out of my system and move forward doing what I can do for myself.  There will be no romance or love this evening.  I will be by myself with my dog.  I will work out for me.  I will watch a movie or tv show.  I will eat dinner, but will be a bit melancholy.  I will put one foot in front of the other and move forward.  Why?  Eventually I will be happy again.  Eventually I will find love and romance again.  will it be as good maybe not, maybe better.  All I know is my old romance is dead.  So I need to find a new romance.

I will embrace change and let go of the past, because I love myself.


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