I have been one who is always fighting change. Though it is good for me, I hate the emotional pain. I hate losing the person I once had in my life. I hate losing the good emotions, the good times, and the good connections. I do not mind losing the bad times. I hate losing the dreams and the ‘what ifs.’
So what do I do next? We are obviously heading in different directions and there is nothing I can do about it. Would it be good to keep the person in my life when they cannot give me what I need? Would it be good for me to keep them in my life if they themselves do not take care of themselves?
Where will I go? Will I ever find anyone like them? I hope so. I hope better than them, though the odds seem insurmountable.
So I write this post to get the angst out of my system and move forward doing what I can do for myself. There will be no romance or love this evening. I will be by myself with my dog. I will work out for me. I will watch a movie or tv show. I will eat dinner, but will be a bit melancholy. I will put one foot in front of the other and move forward. Why? Eventually I will be happy again. Eventually I will find love and romance again. will it be as good maybe not, maybe better. All I know is my old romance is dead. So I need to find a new romance.
I will embrace change and let go of the past, because I love myself.